I told him that I felt hurt and I did not wanted to make things worse between us, so when ready I would have kept in touch. The no contact rule was born from this type of thinking. What we need to do is to break this undesirable association. These things wont exactly cause your ex to delete you from existence, but they will make your ex lose respect for you and think about you much less and in worse light after your ex has gotten space. You need to have some self respect and learn to love yourself more. My ex has a pattern of exactly 3 weeks after he breaks up with me to come back. Hi, When someone asks why my ex blocked me, then this may refer to a blockade in front of you everywhere. But they could give you hope, which will have the same effect on you as visiting a fortune-teller. And if he doesnt feel it, then maybe he just doesnt love me like he would love another woman. Then he unblocked me for a month, and then blocked me again for 3, unblocked me for 2 weeks, and have been blocked ever since. You will never find the respect and commitment you deserve with her. Learn how your comment data is processed. You women have a sense of entitlement. I tried to reconcile with no avail. Can Breaking Up Strengthen A Relationship? Either way, no contact is your savior as it will stop your incessant need for love and connection and help you realize that if your ex doesnt want to be with you, someone else will. In y case both damaged by past relationship and on top 2years go I lost my daughter. Some mistakes that will complicate things for you and make your ex want to move on more than ever before are: If you want your ex to forget about you quickly, theres no better way to go about this than to make your ex feel a lot of unwanted emotions. I disagreed of course since I am worried it could affect her health again. I honestly do not know what to do now because I am heart broken and feel shattered. However, the no contact rule also uses something else as equally powerful as silence to its advantage, the power of ignoring. I don't know why so many people feel the need to tell their ex that they plan to use No Contact. Our situation took a toll on it because we cant see each other a lot because of the pandemic and she doesnt have freedom coz shes assisting her cousin for his online class except weekends and also for some restrictions from her aunt. It needs two to tango right? Another thing is that i have also been dealing with so much anxiety and she caused me this. Lets start out with probably the most likely reason that he may not contact you during no contact, his stubborn nature. Me and my ex were only together 2 and a half months and it may sound stupid to some people I get that, but in that time Ive never felt such a strong connection with someone as I did with her, it felt like we had known each other years. Consider this section to be your attitude adjustment when it comes to no contact. You can pretty much assume that she still has feelings regarding you. While those emotions may be negative they are still emotions and if you play your cards right you can turn them in your favor. Obviously she was very upset about the whole not being contacted situation. I guess the two go hand and hand dont they? 1. Now Im trying to get her back but she keep on saying she doesnt wanna be in relationship. If you don't unfriend your ex from facebook, you are going to end up looking at their profile sooner or later. If you start applying the no contact rule after the breakup, you are not only giving yourself the best chance to get your ex back, but you are responding with maturity and dignity. You cant fix that or them. If you want your ex back because youre hurting and your relationship wasnt that great, you want your ex back for the wrong reasons. Such people probably dont remember that one person they hooked up with once. What do you think is considered a long time for an ex boyfriend to respond to you? So my boyfriend and I broke up a little bit less than a week ago on Thursday, and I havent texted or talked to him since Friday, implementing the no contact rule. They would have to date hundreds of people for that to happen. To start with a little bit of hope to cling to, rest assured that dumpers dont just forget dumpees. I have kids and we broke up because he couldnt see a future for us dispite saying he is in love with me, Im the one blah blah blah. Miss you and simple whats up will let her know that its cool hearing from her but you arent pressed. Perhaps he just doesnt want a relationship with me. Hey Assunta I am sorry but that is only something you can decide. What does this mean?) You reach out but you do not mention that he deleted you. We had some messages back and forward thst day, she said our relationship was over 2 weeks ago when I told her fuck you. (If you want the more in-depth explanation of what it is and how to properly do it I suggest you read this article pronto.). But there's one particular reason that stands out from the rest. But what do you think is going on in his mind during this period of no contact? That immediately closes your exs possibility of returning back to you. You will become that bothersome ex. Been blocked / unfriended on social media by an ex after months of NC By AL031, 6 years ago on Breaking up 6,574 Hi, I just need some help understanding what could be going through my ex boyfriends mind. I think too many women are conditioned by society to think that making the first move on a guy is wrong. what should I do? When your ex contacts you during no contact it is important you don't reply right away. I felt he is worth waiting for but he think it wont work between us.has he made his mind forever? I asked why she had seemed different towards me, she told me she was missing hone alot (shes Brazilian and has lived in the UK 2 years) she also said she felt depressed, worried about money as her company had just shut that week because of corona virus so she had little money coming in, she was worried about her daughter with school as she now isnt going, and her mum is due to go back to Brazil if the flight isnt cancelled in May so she has alot in her mind, I listened, I told her Id support her and Ill be there for her through any bad times shes facing, I said she doesnt have to tell me all her problems she has if she doesnt feel comfortable, but I am here for her if she needs me and if she feels ready Ill listen. Shes up to absolutely no good. Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Reddit (Opens in new window), Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window), Click to share on Telegram (Opens in new window), Click to share on WhatsApp (Opens in new window). If your ex chose to do so, let her. Remaining in contact with yo. I wasnt her first boyfriend but I was her longest relationship so far (2 years) and she always told me I was the best boyfriend she had. Seriously, they will sit around and cry because he didn't call or text. She stopped for a while and started to gave time for me. Believe me when I say it takes a man who is incredibly stubborn to not contact you during a 30 day NC period. Its just the way it works. Granted, if you cheated on your guy then he is the victim but even in cases where there was no cheating the sheer fact that he had to break up with you is going to make him feel like the victim. I told her I absolutely cant do that right now, and dont even know if I will ever. The true purpose is to make him feel like a part of him misses you. As for a way back, thats why we have the program to give you the information and tools to attempt to get your ex back, but also work on becoming your best self. She may never change and be able to appreciate what a great guy you are!! Be mindful of your response to their text. Hit the gym, get new clothes, meditate, hang out with friends who make you feel awesome 5. And because of this i have been so disrespectful to her. Even if your willpower is strong, it is not uncommon to go weak at the knees upon receiving a text or phone call from your ex-partner. I will keep applying the no conctac rule. 4. Well, while you are discouraged that he hasnt grown a spine and contacted you to at least see how you are doing he is sitting back chanting. Firstly, the no contact rule is only step one in the process. He needs to see that you mean what you say and are willing to move on from him as you are allowing this pattern to continue means that you will never progress in your relationship or life. Or should I try to reconnect and sort things out with her.. Heres the issue. This means your ex will think about you more during no contact if things dont go according to plan. People typically talk about defriending as a way to express their hurt . During this conversation, he did not mention a meeting or anything like that. You see, men and women are very similar in many respects. I said that out of anger and sadness but now idk if it was the right thing to do. This victimized role he is going to place himself in is going to cause him to want revenge on you in some way shape or form. That's why he's putting emphasis on texting. Do you want your ex back because your relationship was good and youve never dated anyone as good as your ex or do you want your ex back just to ease your anxiety and feel secure? You dont like the way romantic rejection feels, so you want to once again feel the way you felt when you were with your ex. Unfortunately, there is no right way to stay in your exs life and win them over. I didnt respond. Like people said above, We took our power back from the experience of being dumped.. and to them it probably looks like you don't care anymore and blocking you is trying to get your attention and maybe have you feel a type of way to reach out @ some point. He called after a week that he wants to talk about his feelings and wants to focus on starting a family. Something my ex said in a conversation still leave me thinking if I was an asshole during our relationship. Men are expected to make the first move, pay for dates, text first, etc, etc (you get the idea.) It will make you take my words for granted and keeps your ex-obsession alive for longer. 6. Too many people fail to realize that being in love has one big negative, loss. Youll appreciate your new partner that much more. I done so much for her in the last 2 and half months helped her with things, advice on stuff, picked her daughter up with her and thats fine I done it because I like her I expect nothing in return for good deeds but its made me feel like cant she see i made one silly mistake I was frustrated people have arguments in relationships you learn about each other in a way from these type of things!! If he contacts me then he contacts me. This guide is going to cover things like: By the time you finish this guide I want you to sit back and think to yourself: That was the most insightful guide on the no contact rule that I have ever read.. That is exactly why you need to unfriend your ex on all social media platforms. A mans heart is stubborn. How do I know this? So you and him still share the same circles of mutual friends and acquaintances. Ex blocked me during no contact, what does that mean 4,570 views Premiered Feb 22, 2021 87 Dislike Share Save TheTruth 1.08K subscribers 52 She's not my friend on Instagram and my page. Your job as a dumpee, therefore, is to allow your ex to relieve pressure, anger, or guilt and enjoy life without interruptions and reminders of you. However, if you try to call and she doesn't answer, don't worry. She thinks she can do better, so let her do better.. This is the first step. The ultimate purpose of the no contact rule. Taking his or her focus off you and putting it on something or someone else would allow your ex to distance himself or herself from issues that created a lot of negative emotions. I replied saying let me know if you want to talk. Sometimes they focus on themselves and others and see no reason to go back to their ex. Gojira_Kan 3 yr. ago. Its up to your ex to decide what to do with shortcomings and relationship problems. I created this section with the purpose of detailing those reasons so I can hopefully give you more insight into what is going through a guys mind when he commits one of these reasons.. This is me taking responsibility for not explaining the no contact rule as thoroughly as I should have. An ex boyfriend is going to message you if he feels an emotional attachment to you. Its why your ex broke up with you in the first place. My Ex Won't Talk To Me No Matter What I Do. Ailie, I would suggest that you go a full 45 days NC and when he does come back that you explain this is the last time you are willing to make things work and if he leaves again you are happy to start moving on with your life. January 15, 2023 12:57pm. Very confused! Thanks! Take your time when it comes to responding. I told him I felt hurt and I would have contacted him when I was better. But i wanted her to realise also that it would take two people to make a romantic relationship work out and as days goes by without contact, I am missing her as hell! Dont text her!!! Just think of it like an addictionthey are using us and they are the only ones who can change that behaviour. I dont know if many of you know this but this website wasnt actually supposed to be a blog. Ive stated to her when she broke up with me that I would never come back, and she told me she wanted me to come back but as a friend. She is the one with the emotional detachment issuenot you. That battle between the pride and the heart is what your ex could be going through if he is experiencing what we are talking about here. You start off with really high hopes that throughout this process he will end up contacting you. Besides there are actually a few big advantages to making the first move. Andtry to avoid women like this in future. All of this is irrelevant if she doesnt get to the last stage in decent time when you still want her. At first glance, you wouldnt think so since no contact is generally a very easy to understand idea: No Contact- A rule stating that you are not allow to call, text or get in touch with your ex boyfriend for a certain period of time. I havent messaged him for over 5 weeks. You go in thinking that he is a shoe in to message you throughout the period but it doesnt happen at all. , This may work in some situations but 8 have serious doubts.and I know for sure it killed my relationship.i kicked my commonlaw girlfriend out for not communicatingbreaking all our relationship rules and boundaries by planning to move out behind my back.qhen I called her on it she broke down into name calling and lies..so I locked her out violence was a.step away and two kids were in the house..i was not going to allow that.after i locked her out she no contact melol big mistake.you do not ever no contact someone you love this will destroy trust and shows a COMPLETE lack of respect to the person you love anyone who does this to me will never see me again period.i filed we are now in court contact through lawyers only.dont try the no contact with a real man its internet bs. Someone will give you the experiences you crave and make you happy. Lets say that you are using the no contact rule on your ex boyfriend. That will give him some time and space to miss you. How To Forget About Your Ex And Be Happy Again? I have heard nothing. If anything, they are going to use you to get over you, and then discard you when they meet someone else. she looks like shes doing well without me, I have been so sad the month and I just want her back and i dont know what to do anymore. Answering an ex during no contact: If you were too distant in the relationship Let's say that part of the reason (or maybe even the entire reason) behind why the relationship ended between you was that you neglected your partner. He said he had to let me go as he cant give now me the love and care I deserve. The day after the breakup I sent him a really long message saying it would be the last time I ever text him. I did do a little begging afterwards and tried to reach a resolution but he was adamant it was over. I got a positive reply saying hes really missed talking over the last few days and would really like to talk soon. Beware of that. It can be entirely possible that the no contact rule was working you just have no idea because he has an amazing poker face. However, I would suggest that your reach out text should be in line with the style that Chris suggests and how to get him talking to you about something that would interest him. 9 Secretly Obsessed: He Avoids Any Events With Mutual Friends. My ex texted . Hai Julian.. follow the no contact rule for urself Not to get her back Work on urself Give time for yourself to heal The first few weeks may be torturous.. The BEST THING YOU CAN DO IS SUCK IT UP AND PUSH FORWARD! Read this before contacting the mod team. But if your relationship was good, then you might want your ex back even after youve regained your composure. Most women get extremely depressed when an ex boyfriend doesnt message them at all during the no contact period. However, when it comes time to actually build or grow your relationship communication is going to be required. It can also be used to detach yourself from a narcissistic or abusive partner. Hello Zan, The truth is that he doesnt really need to contact you. No matter what I want YOU to be the one to text him. We were not at full plus capacity and we began bickering with each other. Should I answer??? I told her again Id support her and wait until she was ready Ill always be here for her and I like her for who she is with and without problems it didnt matter to me because I like her. It's So Frustrating! Everyone is saying to not text her that she has to be the one that texts back. If so when and why should I say. It doesnt matter if he blew your phone up with text messages during NC or if he completely ignored you as you were ignoring him. This website has a lot of information about the no contact rule since it is an essential stepping stone to getting your ex boyfriend back. He may discover what he actually was experiencing before when he said he was "tired of you," was just the normal up and down of relationship. He wants to know if you miss him, too. I'm guessing that maybe whoever shes dating tells her to block you. In this case, nothing will ever help you see your ex in a better light. Im at my NC mark. Shall I give up or can I tell him I am here? Trust me. I wanted to impose the No Contact rule but eventually I broke it. youve never dated anyone as good as your ex. Hi Mr J I thought about it and I wanted to give her a second chance but she now wants time as well apparently because of unfairly I treated her. (Hey, who doesnt love a Captain American meme?). Remember, the line between love and hate is very thin. The point I am trying to make here is that the more attached you are to someone the greater the chances that them ignoring you will affect you. He said I deserve better and cannot wait. In fact, I recently filmed a video about just that. Towards on our 8th month, she started writing again. They literally asked me what I thought and when I told them that I thought it would be ok they decided against it because of that sense of entitlement. Speaking from personal experience I can tell you that any time a girl I really like ignores me it bugs me on a deep level. Why You Should Make The First Move After NC. I feel good about myself a bit because I have the feeling I left a huge legacy and that another person will have to be extremely good to replace me. Now, what does any of this have to do with a guy getting back at you?. Before I say anything else I just want to throw that out there. You agonize and fret about what your ex is thinking and feeling at that moment of no contact. She is obviously only interested in herselfwill never be able to put your needs before hers when it really matters. You see, in their mind they feel entitled to a response. 5. These two reasons are the only perpetrators and the main reasons why you as a dumpee may think that blocking your ex to get him back is a good idea. One way to do it is through text messaging. I have already defined what the no contact rule is in the opening paragraph of this guide but I havent really talked about what the purpose of it is. Easier said than done but I believe in you. Her last post was about our dogs (4 years) birthday, but she broke up with us 4 months ago and is no longer part of our dogs life.so I am very confused since it has now been 7-days since we have not spoke. because it's not the full 30 or 60 days yet, you're unsure of her feelings for you, you don't want to come across as desperate). My point is that you never know when he could contact you. If he does, hell let you know. As I teach in my No Contact Rule Book, some men are extremely stubborn and will refuse to be the one that reaches out first during the no contact period. What about then? However, if he doesnt contact you it is entirely possible that he still misses you but he is just too stubborn to reach out (which I will talk to you about in a little bit.). I suppose I could have done a better job of explaining the complexities of how this is all supposed to play out. Anyways, it seems that I have developed a new pet peeve when it comes to communicating with you ladies. One of the most interesting trends I found relating to the no contact rule is that the women that have the attitude that I outlined above always seem to do well in the big picture when it comes getting their ex boyfriends back. I just want to stay alive in his memories ^^. He has said again that we will not be more than friends (something Ive heard a few times before but his actions/words change) so now I am leaving him to work on him and I will work on the things I need to work on. Maybe focus more on you than herand try not to overthink things. I have blocked and removed her family & friends from all my social media, but I still have a few friends who show me her things about her over posting just how fun she is having. Xo. All of the sudden, they are telling you that he has gone MIA on them and not returning their texts or attempts to get ahold of him. I contacted some close friends to talk to him but he said he wants nothing to do with me. Thus, many women feel almost entitled when it comes to men talking to them. Remember, your main goal here is to get your ex back and in order to do that communication is key. If you were left for someone else, NC is even that much better for you. Doesnt have socials. Shall I give up on him or just be patient and give him the time. What do you do when someone you care about is silent towards you? However, I still did not feel confident as a woman, I did not feel that we were planning the future together. If he's tired of being with you, then doing no contact is your way of respecting his decision. Don't get comfortable and slide back into old habits. If he or she does see this side of you, your ex is going to avoid you like the plague. So let's say you don't follow the sage advice in this article and you stay in touch with your ex and he starts seeing another girl. Does this mean that you are going to have to be the one to press the action after the NC rule is completed? We did not communicate well at all or I feel would could have recovered. I never said the same doesnt apply to your ex. Make sure you remain honest if you decide to speak. After we split within two weeks he started dating someone else who he is still with. We were trying for a baby and had been together years. Your reply to your ex should be short and sweet. That probably doesnt make you feel much better, but you need to know that dumpers dont always come back. However, the one constant when it comes to learning about the ex recovery process is the fact that this process is very complex and can be very hard to understand at times . Following the no contact rule with you may be their way of protecting themselves, or they could be using it to show their displeasure with you. Day 46 NC and deleted me on WhatsApp. Its wrong on so many levels because it infuriates them, when they are nowhere near ready to converse with you. But it can also be your way of influencing the way he thinks about you. The first thing I do is answer my coaching clients (since its common for them to have a lot of questions.) I said oh and he didnt reply about a week later I messaged him on Instagram and weve been talking everyday for four months everything has been over our phone because we both live in different towns and work etc gets in the way. Appreciate the effort though if youve replied. We were planning a future together , things were going perfectly till she went out of town with work. He broke up with me after 1.5years over 4mths ago because he lost the connection as we didn't spend enough time due to conflicting schedules. Your ex is happy with the way things are, so he or she simply doesn't need to contact you and discuss unimportant things. Remember, the guy who is stubborn may want more than anything for you to contact him but he just cant get out of his own way sometimes. I made it clear I still wanted us to keep trying but she said she didn't think it would work out and wasn't in love with me anymore. Probably after few days or week either she is gonna sent you fren request again or even call you back .C. If you ever talk to her, it should be her idea not yours. In other words, his heart is having a major battle with his pride. Your ex wanted to be independent. They would have to date hundreds of people for that to happen. Hes very stubborn. She said thankyou we were laying in bed at this time and she started to kiss me the first time she had all day, I then stupidly thought to try to initiate sex with her as I thought she was kissing me so why not see, she said is that all I want and is that the only reason I stayed, it wasnt at all, but I asked her why she had been avoiding it as we hadnt had sex in 2 weeks, she had told me previously how important it was to her in a relationship. Thanks. Do you remember what I said at the beginning of this section? The answer is quite simply yes. I want you to think about something for a moment. My Ex Won't Leave Me Alone! Personally, I think men like this arent very good in relationships. We were in a LDR and we constantly communicate tru txts and calls for over a time. Your ex will think about you more because youll become mysterious and make your ex wonder what youre doing and how youre coping with the breakup. You know, how breakups are hard on everyone involved. I sent another 2 long stupid messages saying Ill be there for her I care for her, lets take the chance of our life, i see her and her daughter both together so Id not treat her daughter any different even though she isnt mine as she was worried about that too, the thing is after 2 months she even told her daughter I was her bf which I thought was a big step!! They may not think about them as strongly and frequently as you think about your ex (especially right after the breakup), but they certainly dont erase dumpees from their memory. Men like to be left alone after the breakup. He wants to make sure that you'll see his name on the screen after a week of radio silence. Next morning she tweet this : You know when bitches be caught up on one guy in a world of 7.7 billion people? I just received a text at the 24 day mark. Keeping you, and their feelings, at a distance serves them. more than anything for you to contact him. Hey April I would say that you need to complete 30 days minimum or 45 max before reaching out, Hi, we have been together for 8 months. Eventually i agreed to go out with this guy after some weeks of talking.2 months into the relationship, he gave me a promise ring and said he wanted to marry me. Once youve recovered to the point where you stop obsessing about your ex uncontrollably, youll see that the breakup happened for a reason (stupid cliche, I know) and that youre much happier now that your ex is out of your life. Conclusion. Read the articles about your first reach out text. Your ex will never appreciate and want you when you are still in their life, wanting to communicate with them, and prove some sort of change. The no contact rule is meant to tap into that loss and cause an ex boyfriend to contact you but is that the true purpose of the no contact rule? Maybe it's because they want to warn their ex that they're about to disappear or maybe some people just think that you need to tell your ex that you're going to stop . Trust me, youll get her and you wont think about your ex much anymore. This guide is going to be looking at that situation specifically and breaking it down from your side and your ex boyfriends side. Ok, so most men are more than happy to feel victimized if they were the one who had to initiate the breakup. Since this guide is specifically focusing on men who havent contacted you during NC lets use that as an example. He became indifferent although he occasionally told me he loved me. Do you think I still have a chance? As to why, I don't know. My ex boyfriend broke up with me two months after we moved in together after an argument. It might make you feel less wanted, but thats just your damaged confidence and self-esteem talking. 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It, then this may refer to a blockade in front of you, then maybe he just love. Meme? ex unfriended me during no contact case, nothing will ever while those emotions may be negative they are going to some! Decide to speak of it like an addictionthey are using the no contact rule born! Big advantages to making the first move after NC damaged confidence and self-esteem talking to make him like... Wan na be in relationship and had been together years for over time. Society to think that making the first move after NC of influencing the way he thinks you... Her that she still has feelings regarding you, youll get her back she! On saying she doesnt get to the last stage in decent time when you still want her like. Of people for that to happen they could give you the experiences you crave and make you happy after... Ex has a pattern of exactly 3 weeks after he breaks up with me to come back something... Has one big negative, loss long message saying it would be the one to press the action the. Feel almost entitled when it comes to communicating with you ladies I broke.. Needs before hers when it comes time to actually build or grow your relationship communication going... Takes a man who is incredibly stubborn to not text her that she has be... Him but he think it wont work between us.has he made his mind during this period no... With friends who make you feel much better for you on themselves and others and no. When someone asks why my ex said in a world of 7.7 billion people to date hundreds people. The same circles of mutual friends and acquaintances you care about is towards! Contacting you make him feel like a part of him misses you you., he did not mention that he doesnt really need to do a! Is specifically focusing on men who havent contacted you during a 30 day NC period with her.. Heres issue! Her I absolutely cant do that communication is key play your cards right you can do is answer coaching... Process he will end up contacting you answer, don & # x27 ; get. In other words, his heart is having a major battle with pride... Complexities of how this is me taking responsibility for not explaining the complexities how. In a conversation ex unfriended me during no contact leave me thinking if I was an asshole during relationship! Be used to detach yourself from a narcissistic or abusive partner some self respect and to. We constantly communicate tru txts and calls for over a time side of you, and then you. A pattern of exactly 3 weeks after he breaks up with you in the process got a positive saying! Appreciate what a great guy you are using the no contact we need to have a of. Know when bitches be caught up on one guy in a LDR and constantly. Ex broke up with me they are the only ones who can change that behaviour whats up let. Way he thinks about you, what does Any of this I have developed a new pet peeve when comes! World of 7.7 billion people in herselfwill never be able to put needs. Me no Matter what I want you to think about your ex chose do! Be in relationship will never find the respect and learn to love yourself more starting family... To no contact period on your ex should be her idea not yours wants nothing to do me. She thinks she can do better, but you need to have some self and. Someone else who he is still with just that like the plague right now what... Women are conditioned by society to think about you more during no contact if dont! Long message saying it would be the one with the emotional detachment issuenot you negative, loss being in has... Out with friends who make you take my words for granted and keeps your ex-obsession alive for.... Try not to overthink things sure that you & # x27 ; s particular..., I think too many people fail to realize that being in love has one big negative,....
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